Archive for May, 2008
There is more to this than being a Christian
“Life is hard”, I think someone with more insight said this in the book, “A Road Less Traveled”.
Accepting life as hard is relative to ones perspective.
Sometimes my life seems hard.
Here is what is hard about my life:
I work in a start up business with my family and friends.
Sure there are a lot of other facets to what happens in life from day to day, but to break it down. I am in a web of relationships I care deeply about. I am apart of a community that is providing for the needs I have both, physically, emotionally and spiritually. And I am responsible to those relationships. However when those relationships cross and one goes one way and the other goes another there is a cross road.
I am sitting at a personal cross road right now. I will make a decision this next month and see where that leads me. There have been several times in my life I have tried to take a step toward a “calling”. I do not believe in “calling” as I once did. I do believe in desire, need and ability and I believe God is the creator of them all. However, i believe in our humanity and inability to fully know God’s will, that is why I believe in the need for an incarnational God/Jesus. I believe the story because i want to, due to my personal experience and understanding of history, the gospels, the bible, and context.
This is why I believe a old desire is returning:
I have a desire to serve the Church. I have tried many different avenues since i was young, now I am asking what is it I can do now to serve a need in the Church, both locally and globally.
There was a time I wanted to be in church to be known/famous. I still want to be known by the greater Christian community, but I do not want to be famous in it.
There was a time I wanted to start a church. Now I would like to help people find and develop community. I have learned a lot through being in vocational ministry and the past three years of finding my way again.
I am good at entering a mess and seeing God in the beauty. Right now I stand at a cross road conflicted and scared.
God give me strength.
Random thoughts for the way home
I drive three to five days out of the week for my job. I go anywhere from Lehigh, Princeton, Philly, and Wilmington.
I see a lot of changes when drive…
Today I noticed several business’s closing. One of them was a theater, the other was a furniture store. (Why do furniture stores always go out of business?)
My answer is, IKEA.
Recently I furnished my living room with the gift from George Bush for all of those who support the war or pay taxes. Actually I do not know why we got money, but like a consumer I went and spent it.
This is the first time in my life my wife, Andrea and I furnished a room in one of our space with stuff we like. In the past we would fill it with stuff we thought we should buy, like a good married couple. Tonight one of my friends was over and he said, “your apartment does not feel like a married couple lives here. It feels like one of you are single.” I later commented that I am not sure if he meant that is a positive or negative. I guess we no longer fill our space with “married” peoples stuff.
Space matters, and if I am going to live in it, I would like to enjoy where I live. (hey look I am even blogging because of the space I am in right now)
Coffee, Conversation, And Community development
Andrea, my wife of six years this June 1st, is finishing her MBA in ecconomic development from, and I was able to spend an evening with her class, which confirmed my need to be around more thinking Christians. People who are engaged in the world, realizing, “hey I can not change the world, but I can make an impact, and I can find a role in this great big world that fits…”
I enjoyed our conversations at “Fridays” and once again found my self confirmed in what I am apart of at One Village Coffee.
This Past weekend my friend Josh Smith and wife Gina Smith came up from Maryland to celebrate his graduation from .
This past weekend we shared meals and stories of our journey.
Friday evening Jared Byas , Josh and I sat on the upper porch off my “man room” to be… and spoke of our dreams to develope community to see trasformation of culture and lives for the betterment of the the world.
The ideas past around that evening were inspiring and once again confirming the place I am right now with where I live, what I do and what I am preparing to do.
The feelings of being behind the curve or underprepared seem to rear their head when i am around my younger counter parts who have taken on responabilities like; Master Degrees, Children and Pastoral position in a church.
After this weekend several things have been concluded in my mind.
It is time to start planing for a coffee shop for community development in partnership with the vision of One Village Coffee.
It is time to start planning for a child.
It is time to start planning for new education in the world of managment, non-profit community development and organizational leadership.
Who knows…
Maybe all these conversations this past week are connected, or maybe it is just Gods way of saying,
“keep trying, keep believing, keep inspiring others along the way. I am in you as you are in me and I will reveal my true nature to others as you become who you are.”
I am excitted about this new season.
